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If women who are insecure about their bodies love a “Dad bod,” does that mean beautiful women are attracted to men with a six-pack? And who came up with that ridiculous term?
“Dad bod”
Yesterday an article was published here about the Dad bod. An objective report on the phenomenon called Dad bod:
The male body with curves and without a six-pack would be what most women find attractive.
When I saw something about this on Facebook two weeks ago, I didn’t take it seriously. “A rather weak attempt by a man with a beer belly to spin public perception in his favor,” I thought.
“It’ll blow over, just like the metrosexual.”
But, no.
The Dad bod is actually gaining momentum, and the idea behind the Dad bod is gaining recognition through the blog of American student Mackenzie Pearson. Then, Editie NL conducts a survey indicating that the vast majority of Dutch women agree with her.
I can’t help but feel compelled to approach the Dad bod and its underlying idea a bit more critically (and subjectively).
Dad bod? Just a Bad bod!
Mackenzie is a student and writes on her blog that the students who skip the gym once and instead have an extra beer apparently get rewarded for this[1].
She heard about the term Dad bod when a friend of hers mentioned it.
“Guys who like a beer, but also work out.”
So why the term Dad bod when it’s just about anyone who hasn’t found a way to balance between fun and a nice body?
As a 38-year-old father with a six-pack, I don’t feel at all targeted by the term. Let us fathers please be left out of it and come up with another excuse for your beer belly.
Being a father is no excuse for having a less-than-ideal figure, and a woman should understand that.
Men may complain about difficult behavior from pregnant women, but that’s quite different from carrying a child yourself for nine months and all the physical consequences that come with it.
Okay, the stress hormone cortisol may play a role in belly fat [2,3]. Cortisol can cause your body to produce less insulin to keep your blood sugar available as energy to cope with stress. More glucose means more fat can be converted.
In today’s world, however, there are more stress factors than children.
It’s a bit silly to blame your kids for your beer belly.
“Not Intimidated by a Beer Belly”
We don’t want a guy that makes us feel insecure about our body. We are insecure enough as it is.
Mackenzie Pearson
So women who don’t feel insecure about their bodies are attracted to men with a six-pack?
That’s a win-win situation for owners of a six-pack, in my opinion.
A woman can feel confident about her body because she’s just a very self-assured woman regardless of her appearance.
As a modern man, I find a confident woman very attractive. That was the politically correct answer, but secretly I hope, of course, that all those other women are so confident because they just have a nice figure.
If those are the ones who find a man with a six-pack attractive, then I don’t see a reason to give up the six-pack.
Conversely, I think men would appear somewhat more confident when faced with a similar choice. “Too good for me” are words I’ve never heard a man say. But then again, we are shallow.
“Then I Know What I’m Getting Into”
The most nonsensical argument for the Dad bod:
Therefore, if he already has the dad bod going on, we can get used to it before we date him, marry him, have three kids.
Mackenzie Pearson
I’ve joked about this too when I met my wife who already had two children. But this can’t be compared because I was right. My wife had already gone through two pregnancies and, twenty years and a third child later, still has a better figure than many teenagers.
To reason like this when it comes to the beer belly of a male student is actually the opposite of what you should do. After all, who says this is the end result? I’ve never heard a man say:
“I’m looking for a thicker woman because then I already know what she’ll look like when we have kids.”
Men are probably smart enough to already imagine adding a few pounds in their minds.
That “cute, non-intimidating beer belly” could easily turn into a beer barrel. The fact that you can’t achieve a certain figure at a young age, whether out of ignorance or lack of interest, is hardly a guarantee that someone will stay at a healthy weight.
“As Long as I’m the Prettiest”
We want to look skinny and the bigger the guy, the smaller we feel and the better we look next to you in a picture.
Mackenzie Pearson
As a photographer, I don’t entirely agree with that.
Yes, I’ll probably place the woman half in front of the man to cover up his larger figure a bit. So you’re in the spotlight and look the best in the photo. This reminds me of the “Big-fish-little-pond-effect” described by Malcolm Gladwell in “David and Goliath.” It assumes that you feel good as long as you’re doing better than your peers, much like relative poverty.
I have a more positive view of women than to think they’re so selfish and vain that they have to look good at the expense of us. On the other hand, I’ve seen enough programs about bridezillas to recognize the apparently instinctive need of women to be the most beautiful.
Personally, I go for the most beautiful overall picture and I’d rather see a beautiful couple in front of the camera than a woman with a man serving as a background screen.
“No Food Obsession”
The Dad bod can safely eat a taco every now and then while we fitness freaks do meal prep and never dare to stray from our diet, according to MacKenzie.
Granted, I described this phenomenon in “muscle dysmorphia,” which can significantly affect social life for some.
The real fitness lifestyle is finding a balance between sensible things in life and pleasures.
We’re not all completely insane. Just look at the significantly grown, otherwise insane “Jersey Shore generation” who get drunk at festivals every weekend and are back in the gym training with a six-pack on Monday.
And sometimes still natural!
More importantly: Instead of feeling good because your man is thicker, it might be nicer if you could adopt some of his healthy habits. Then you both look good in that photo.
It’s Softer to Cuddle
Touché.
At least, as long as it’s not a beer barrel when that cuddly student has actually become a father. After all, when you do need something harder, it’s not nice to have to look for it for fifteen minutes first.
Who’s MacKenzie?
Mackenzie is a student who simply comes up with an explanation for the taste of a friend and others with the same taste. Her article gains so-called legitimacy through surveys like that of Editie NL and blogs like queerty.com.
They asked the question: “Are Dad Bods sexy?”[4].
82% say yes!
Which doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t find a six-pack sexy, I think, wishfully.
It’s possible that the preference reflected in the surveys is actually representative of the taste of the “average woman.”
I mean, tastes can differ without psychological underpinnings.
If that needs to be sought, I would find actual research into the reason for that preference more interesting than MacKenzie’s assumptions.
She does deserve all the praise, though, for managing to destroy the ideal image of a man in 500 words and taking away all the work of personal trainers if it weren’t for the fact that their clients mostly consist of women.
Women who then drool over those trainers’ arms and stand completely hysterically screaming for male strippers (with six-packs), leaving us men completely confused about what the ideal image is.
Just Jealous
I’m obviously just jealous that almost 2/3 of women apparently don’t find me attractive, at least according to Editie.nl.
Hence the title.
And I’m naturally dry!
I can’t even imagine how annoyed you’d be if you’d worked hard for years.
However, I’ve found a solution online: “The Beer Belly.”
A portable drink container that you wear under your clothes, creating the appearance of a beer belly, with actual beer inside!
References:
- theodysseyonline.com/clemson/dad-bod/97484
- Moyer AE, Rodin J, Grilo CM, Cummings N, Larson LM, Rebuffé-Scrive M. Stress-induced cortisol response and fat distribution in women. Obes Res. 1994 May;2(3):255-62. PubMed PMID: 16353426.
- Epel EE, Moyer AE, Martin CD, Macary S, Cummings N, Rodin J, Rebuffe-Scrive M. Stress-induced cortisol, mood, and fat distribution in men. Obes Res. 1999 Jan;7(1):9-15. PubMed PMID: 10023725.
- queerty.com/beer-bellies-are-now-officially-considered-sexy-youre-welcome-20150506
